Two Scotsmen arrive at opposite sides of a one-lane bridge at exactly the same time.

Each is too stubborn to move aside and let the other cross. They sit there glaring at each other for about an hour. Finally one grins mockingly at the other and takes up a thick copy of War and Peace from the seat beside him. He makes a great show of opening up the book and slowly, attentively, reading each page, sneaking surreptitious looks at the driver on the other side of the bridge every time he licks his finger and turns the page.

The other driver stirs behind the wheel. The reader feels a flush of triumph, which is dashed when his opponent gets out of his car and stumps up to him.

"When you're finished with that book," he says gruffly, "Will you loan it to me?"